While having a conversation with a friend recently something came very obvious and shocking to me. I have hit a wall in terms of what I am doing with my life and in order to get ahead I need to make some changes.
I hit a wall with the following.
- career
- social
- business
Don’t get me wrong, living at home is great but now it seems like it is doing more harm then good for me. It isn’t really any one’s fault, it is up to me now to make a decision if I want to be stuck or move ahead and have the potentially to become a better person, more successful and finally start my life on my terms.
School…the path to your future
I know school such as college and University is the time for us to make up our mind in terms of what we want to do but it looks like I never really figured out what I wanted to do during that time. It is 2 years after graduating and I am actually confident now that I know what I want to do with my life in terms of where I want to go, what I want to achieve and how to get there.
But as I said, my current environment I am in will not help me in this journey going ahead. I think one of the biggest factors for me to really consider is the people I hang out with. I need to start asking myself do my friends make me become a better person or are they just there to fill the empty stop and just have a good time?
Who are your friends?
I mean if you hang around people who are less successful than yourself, how can you ever learn something new and better yet, how can you get ahead and become a better person? You can’t it just doesn’t work.
Also, living at home with parents is great but there comes a time where you need to take the training wheels off and go out and try on just two wheels. It is time to make new rules to live by, have the freedom, experience it and learn to live a real life.
I think there are many things I am missing out on and simply don’t understand. I mean by living at home I will never appreciate what it feels like to work hard each month to make sure you can have a roof over your head and food on the table. Right now, if I take off a week that doesn’t affect but what happens when you are out on your own? It will make a huge deal because I could essentially end up on the street.
Part 2 will be continued tomorrow…find it here.
In the meantime, have you hit a wall yourself, how did you overcome it?
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Andrew
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It’s not uncommon for more and more young people to still live with their parents and for longer, too, lately. I know people who still lived at home when they were 28 – for various reasons – job in same city, needed to save up the $, etc. Don’t automatically see it as meaning you’re “not successful.”
On the other hand, it could still be that it’s time to move on… can you afford to move out? Do up a realistic budget and see what you need to cut back on or how much more income you need. What can you start saving up for now that would help the process? Don’t just jump off the boat because you can’t stand it anymore – plan for it. Now that you know it’s time to move out, take a least a good month (2?) to properly plan where you will live, what your goals are, etc. etc. in order to make it a real improvement. Just my two cents…
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MoneyEnergy, thanks for your comment.
Yes, many young people are living longer and longer at home which could make sense for some.
At least for me it doesn’t at this point. I mean I have thought everything over and drawn up a budget so I know what needs to be done before I get there. Within a month or so I should be ready, that is financially and mentally to move out.
I know that its not that easy because it feels so much better to just stay where I am, but that is probably a huge problem by staying within the comfort zone.
“I know school such as college and University is the time for us to make up our mind in terms of what we want to do but it looks like I never really figured out what I wanted to do during that time.”
That’s a big problem with our generation, I think. College is NOT the best place to learn what you want to do in life. In college, you may figure out what you like to STUDY, but that is far from the same — and perhaps why we have so many “professional” students. But we rush into college because we’re supposed to get “a degree”, even though we don’t know which because most of us haven’t had a lot of work experience and don’t know what we want to do afterward. College is a HUGE expense and just because student loans are socially acceptable doesn’t mean that they are good for you. I don’t think anyone should spend such huge amounts just willy-nilly because they’re expected to be in college. People should do their research first (including internships, volunteering, shadowing, and other work experience) and make a plan — even if they do decide to change that plan later.
As for friends…
There are many different types of friends. Some friends you shouldn’t look up to — though you may learn a lot from their mistakes and they can be fun to hang out with (goodness knows, I have a few that fit the bill). And many people you learn from and admire don’t have to be your friends to be mentors. But yes, it is often good to associate with people that you want to be more like and study how they think. After all, we are all influenced by whom we hang out with to some degree because we seek friends’ advice and their own voices can become part of our internal dialogue. And at the very least, you might be limited in the quality and quantity of counsel you receive if you’re only hanging out with a certain group.
Meg, thanks for your comment.
Actually I agree that college may not be the best time for some of us to figure out what we really want to do. I mean when I was in school, what I studied and how it was taught, they basically painted a picture perfect world, but when you really get out there, it is so much different.
Maybe we are just pressured to follow the routine, of high school and then college and then job.
Also, the cost factor is becoming a huge issue and I think it is more of a tactic to get students hooked on debt and keep them struggling for years to come.
And yes, friends are becoming more and more crucial when it comes to this stage of life, you are either staying in one place or moving ahead and this can be seen easily with the kind of friends you have.